bagelchips:

shoutout to the kid that whispers the answer to you when the teacher calls on you but you weren’t paying attention

(via theluckiestclover)

commanderinqueef:

today at the park some guy broke his ankle and one of the people said “give him some lettuce” and everyone just stared at him for like 7 seconds until he said “I meant ice”

(via theluckiestclover)

the-eleventh-blog:

odairbear:

do you british and american people not realize how confusing it is cause I never know if I should write color or colour

just remember who invented the language

(via theluckiestclover)

drbippy:

Tim Burton should just make a movie called ‘Johnny Depp’.

plot twist: Johnny Depp is played by Helena Bonham Carter

(Source: funeralfrost, via xsparkage)

rubywhiterabbit:

My little brother got into outer space and stuff so my step-mom bought him a place mat with all the planets on it. When I first saw it, I was upset, because it was newer and so Pluto wasn’t labeled. I was about to say something when I noticed something…

Pluto is there.

The artist remembered Pluto.

Guys…

The artist drew Pluto crying.

(via theluckiestclover)

beyoncebeytwice:

i don’t think we’re using this site the way it was intended to be used

(via theluckiestclover)

splinteryourspine:

splinteryourspine:

I just watched an old couple get into their car and set off the alarm and then try to turn it off for like ten minutes before giving up and driving away with the alarm still going off

now that i think about it maybe i just watched an old couple steal a car

(via stopcallingmeswarley)

phlynn:

remember when people choked on cinnamon to entertain the internet

(via stopcallingmeswarley)

weasleysweaters:

If I were in the Hunger Games I would use one of the parachutes and gift containers and put all kinds of poisonous berries in them and then climb trees and send them down to unsuspecting tributes. Oh, you thought you were getting a nice fruit salad? Think again. POISON.

(via stopcallingmeswarley)